FROM GINA MARION'S FACEBOOK POST
I
waited a few days before I wrote this because I wasn't sure if I wanted
to share, but time and time againour life is Gods
testimony!
I have heard a lot of people say that the media goes on and
on about the death of an entertainer yet people all around the world die
every day and I agree. Robin Williams’s death is different. His
death reached millions who suffer from the same
disease--It is called depression!!
You see for the most part I will post
positive things, except for an occasional breakdown. Well
truth be told, I suffer from severe depression and I have thought about
suicide my whole life. Only a few people know that because it is
something I am not proud of, but I am not ashamed. When I share my story, those thoughts have
helped other people who go through the same thing. Have I tried to commit suicide? Yes!! One time is all it took and fear
came into my soul and I realized I wasn't sure where I was going if I did
this. I didn't want to live but I didn't want to go to HELL either! Did the
suicide thoughts go away? No. Not until a year and a half ago.
You see,
instead of trying to take my life I just got down on my knees and begged
God to take my life. Am I still depressed? Yes, and I will have to
renew my mind every day of my life when that feeling overwhelms me.
There is a feeling that overpowers me when trouble comes my way......a
feeling of panic. I can't get my head to see things clearly. I have
been to therapists and I have taken anti-depressants, but it wasn't
until I found my church back home that I realized that for me Jesus was
all I had and all I needed. When I moved back to Vegas the depression
was the worst it has ever been and I was so depressed that instead of
going into my room and asking God to take my life I would say it in
front of my husband and kids. I would scream and beg and do the ugly
cry.
People call Robin Williams a coward for taking his life and that is just
not true! His death has caused more people to call the suicide hotline
than they can handle. Last month in Vegas there were 3 suicides and
that is just in one week. I realized yesterday as I sat in my house
alone for the day how so many people think I am strong and a good
person, I tell it like it is and I am funny and crazy and that's true, but I am
also sad every day of my life! I asked myself yesterday, if Robin
Williams could do this, will you?
I will say No but I guess my life
will tell! I am sharing this because My Savior Jesus keeps me lifted and
He loves me. His love is all I need and when the pain comes in my heart
and the thoughts of pain come in my head I think of God. I go to his
word and he can turn my day around! So for any of you out there who
suffer from the disease called Depression--because yes it is a disease--I am
lifting you up in prayer and I will always be here to get through it with
you...either via my Facebook page or Comments on this blog. YOU ARE NEVER ALONE!
Today I met with my agent Carol and one
of the two writers for my book Morgan. Morgan and Denny have written my
story and I will tell you it hasn't been easy for them. I have had to
dig deep in me to come up with my past and it really hard. I made
things difficult but they never, and I mean never, walked
away from me!
So go out today and remember whether that person is
rich or poor, a mommy or daddy, employed or unemployed, married or
single, young or old, show them love. You see the spirit of Depression
is like Satan.......it doesn't care who you are or what you have. It wants
to destroy you! Be blessed and be a blessing!!!
